By Raza Shaikh Siddiqui
Spiritually conscious individuals see and feel the greatness in people and the world. If you’re one of them, you might also feel negativity, oftentimes deeper than others.
You may feel an obligation to take a stand for those being spoken down to, belittled, or treated unjustly. You want to be the protector or warrior who fights for that person, animal, or the overall environment.
Emotions like these are part of human nature. They give us information about what we’re experiencing and help us know how to react.
Tips to achieve a peaceful and balanced conversation.
1. Be Aware of Personal Emotions
You’re emotionally attached to the topic that has sparked the desire to speak up. That’s not a bad thing. Use your awareness to control your actions and words. Ask yourself these questions:
- What emotion am I feeling?
- What would I like the other party or person to comprehend?
- Why do I feel so strongly about this particular subject?
- Am I speaking opinions from a place that is programmed or in present awareness?
2. Being apart of Personal Attacks
- Try not taking the attacks personally. Try to detach yourself, recognising the attack as more about the attacker’s emotional needs and communication skills, rather than a reflection on you.
- Accept anger.Accept that it is normal to be angry when you are personally attacked. It’s what you do with your anger that counts and it will be the anger that will allow you to act and move forward.
- Detach from the need to have everyone’s positive regard. Accepting that not everyone will like or value you all of the time will be helpful as it will free you from needing the attacker to think well of you. This helps if you know who you are and can see yourself and your values clearly.
You never know what another person is going through internally. A person who already has stressed, sadness, or anger built up from another challenge in life is much more likely to react with negativity. Perhaps, you’re this person.
3. Simple Mindset
Most of us are aware of what starts, drives, and escalates the fire in heated discussions. Just because you are aware, doesn’t mean you think of them in the moment. Become mindful of:
- Body language
- Tone of voice or statement
Breathing is the process of moving air into and out of the lungs to facilitate gas exchange with the internal environment, mostly by bringing in oxygen and flushing out carbon dioxide. Breathing has other important functions. It provides a mechanism for speech, laughter and similar expressions of the emotions.
Breathing will help keep the energy in the room calm. Take control of the vibrations around you.
We have all walked into a room after a debate and felt the thickness. You have unlimited power to control this. Breathe, as you give others their time to speak. Take slow breaths, in and out through the nose. With each breath out, think of positivity and understanding filing the space.
5. What wheel (chakra) is controlling this Conversation?
Knowing what wheel is controlling the conversation can make you more aware and help you approach a conversation peacefully. Here’s a full description and color chart of chakras.
- Root wheel: This wheel is responsible for our survival. Fight or flight response is used. If you are choosing to have a heated discussion you obviously did not run. So are you in fight mode?
- Sacral wheel: The creative wheel could provide some creative approaches for calmness, understanding, and breakthrough.
- Heart: Are you providing a loving approach to this conversation? This doesn’t mean you have to tell the other person you love them; it means that you are speaking on the topic from a loving place.
- Third Eye: The third eye chakra plays the important role of intuition. Focusing on this chakra during a heated discussion can help you tune in to your higher self. Allowing the Universe to guide your words.